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Subject: Editorial nits for RM and RM Policy
Editorial
issues in WS-RM 1.
Section 2 Change
“…by the RM Source, of unacknowledged message.” to
“…by the RM Source, of an unacknowledged message." 2.
Section 2.1 Glossary “Acknowledgement
Request: A
message containing a AckRequested header.” Change “a”
to “an”. “Sequence
Traffic Messsage:
A message containing a Sequence header block.” Change
“Messsage” to “Message”. 3. Section 2.4 Example
Message Exchange
Figure 2
has unnecessary spaces in text.
“and
and reclaims any resources associated with the Sequence”
Change
“and and” to “and”.
4. Section 3.2
Considerations on the Use of "Piggy-Backing"
This
section uses the acronym “EPR” without it being defined.
5. 3.4 Sequence Creation
incorrect extensibility description
/wsrm:CreateSequence/wsrm:Offer/@{any}
/wsrm:CreateSequenceResponse/wsrm:Accept/@{any}
“This
is an extensibility mechanism to allow different (extensible) types of
information, based on a schema, to be passed.”
This
appears to be the /{any} description rather than the proper /{@any} description
as follows.
“This
is an extensibility mechanism to allow additional attributes, based on schemas,
to be added to the element”
6. Section 3.8 incorrect
reference
reference
to section 3.1 should be 3.4
7.
/wsrm:CreateSequenceResponse/wsrm:Expires “causing
the Sequence to be silently teriminated”
Change
“teriminated” to “terminated”.
8. Section 3.9 Sequence
Acknowledgement
“on
any SOAP envelope targetted to the endpoint referenced”
Change
“targeted” to “targeted”.
9. Section 3.9 Sequence
Acknowledgement
“It
contains a range of Sequence MessageNumbers”
There is
no element “MessageNumbers”. I suggest using
“MessageNumber’s” or the English phrase “message
numbers”.
10. 4.4 Invalid
Acknowledgement, Condition box
“SequenceKnowledgement”
should be “SequenceAknowledgement“
Reference
to Section 3.6 should be 3.9.
11. 4.6 Create Sequence
Refused
Capitalize
“create” in “[Reason] create Sequence…”
12. Section 4.5 Message
Number Rollover
“RM
Desi nation SHOULD continue to accept undelivered”
Change
“Desi nation” to “Destination”.
13. Section 4.9 Unsupported
Selection
“in
the extensibility section of the message that is not support.ed”
Change
“support.ed” to “supported”.
14. Section 5 Security Threats and
Countermeasures
“For example, if an
attacker is able to swap Sequence
headers on message”
The font
size used for “Sequence” is too small. This problem is
pervasive in this section and makes it very hard to read the header/element
names. 15. Section 5.2 Security
Solutions and Technologies
“Secondly,
the RM Destination to performs an authorization check against this
authenticated identity and determines if the RM Source is permitted to create
Sequences with the RM Destination.” Change
“to performs” to “performs”. 16. Section 5.2.1 Transport Layer Security
“This
section describes how the the facilities” Change
“the the” to “the”. 17. Section
5.2.1.2 Countermeasure Implementation
“Subsequent
to the establishment of the the” Change
“the the” to “the”. 18. Section
5.2.2.2 Countermeasure Implementation
‘Issues
specific to the life-cycle management of WS-SecurityConversation” Change
“SecurityConversation” to “SecureConversation”.
Search for this error globally. 19. 6.1 Securing Sequences
Using WS-Security
“When a RM Source
Transmits a CreateSequence that has been
extended to include a wsse:SecurityTokenReference it SHOULD ensure
that the RM Destination both understands and will conform with the requirements
listed above.” Change
“Transmits” to “transmits”. Change “will conform
with” to “will conform to”. 20.
References W3C
Note, "SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1,"
08 May 2000 ALL
of the references should have the URI of the reference in clear text so it is
visible in printed copies of the specification. For example change the
above reference to the following: [SOAP
1.1] W3C
Note, "SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1,"
08 May 2000 http://www.w3.org/TR/2000/NOTE-SOAP-20000508/ 21.
SOAP 1.1 reference [SOAP
1.1] W3C Note,
"SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1,"
08 May 2000. Change
“W3C Note” to “W3C Member Submission” (to match other
similar references). 22.
XML and schema references W3C
Recommendation, "Extensible Markup Language (XML) 1.0 (Second
Edition)", October 2000. Is there any
reason to not refer to the more recent Fourth Edition? W3C Recommendation,
"XML
Schema Part 1: Structures," 2 May 2001. W3C
Recommendation, "XML Schema Part 2: Datatypes," 2 May
2001 The XML
Schema references could also be updated. Should they refer to the second
edition? [BSP
1.0] WS-I Working
Group Draft. "Basic Security Profile Version 1.0,"
March 2006 The
date of the referenced document is August 2006. 24.
RDDL reference [RDDL
2.0] “Johnathan
Borden” change “Johnathan” to “Jonathan”. 25.
Inconsistent use of bold Note
in the following text that some of the content model items are in bold and some
are not. I think they are all meant to be in bold. /wsrm:CreateSequence … /wsrm:CreateSequence/wsrm:AcksTo …
/wsrm:CreateSequence/wsrm:Expires 26.
Content model introduction inconsistent From Section
3.7 Sequences, “The following describes the content model of the Sequence
header block. /wsrm:Sequence” I
prefer this form of introduction to the content model text. Unfortunately
it is NOT used in many other sections. I would prefer if the other
sections used this text. This would also separate the exemplar from the
description of the content model. Editorial
issues in HTML version of WS-RM 1. WSRMP XML
Schema file, Appendix B 2. Lost shading
Editorial
issues in RM Policy
1. 2.2 Normative Outline
Three
out of the four items in this section have their description in italics and one
does not. This inconsistency should be fixed. 2. Section 2.3 Assertion
Attachment
“There
might be certain RM implementations that are incapable of applying RM QoS
semantics” “QoS”
is never defined. Replace with “Quality of Service (QoS)”. 3. Section 2.5.1 Sequence STR Assertion
“/wsrm:SequenceSTR
/@wsp:Optional="true" “ There
is an unneeded blank space after “wsrm:SequenceSTR” and before the
“/”. This should be removed. Note
this problem exists in several other places in the document. 4.
Section 4 References [SOAP
1.1] W3C
Note, "SOAP:
Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000 ALL
of the references should have the URI of the reference in clear text so it is
visible in printed copies of the specification. For example change the
above reference to the following: [SOAP
1.1] W3C
Note, "SOAP:
Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000 http://www.w3.org/TR/2000/NOTE-SOAP-20000508/ 5.
SOAP 1.1 reference [SOAP
1.1] W3C Note,
"SOAP:
Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000. Change
“W3C Note” to “W3C Member Submission” (to match other
similar references). 6. [WS-RM] reference OASIS WS-RX
Technical Committee Draft, "Web Services Reliable Messaging (WS-ReliableMessaging),"
September 2005. The date on
this reference should be August 2006. 7.
XML and schema references [XML] W3C
Recommendation, "Extensible
Markup Language (XML) 1.0 (Second Edition)", October 2000. Is there any
reason to not refer to the more recent Fourth Edition? [XML-Schema
Part1] W3C
Recommendation, "XML
Schema Part 1: Structures," 2 May 2001. [XML-Schema
Part2] W3C
Recommendation, "XML
Schema Part 2: Datatypes," 2 May 2001 The XML
Schema references could also be updated. Should they refer to the second
edition? 8.
RDDL reference [RDDL
2.0] Reference “Johnathan
Borden” change “Johnathan” to “Jonathan”. |
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